shades of grey;

The University of Melbourne
more details HERE

Wednesday, January 11, 2006
In searching for my shangri-la.

Why must things always end up this way? sigh. Tell me how bad can it get. Is it me, or is it my emo that stirred me in this mess. I don't want to live in my dreams anymore. I am supposed to look forward, and throw back everything unhappy back to 2oo5. It's always easier said than done. What's the hardest thing you've ever tried to forget?

It's only 27 days before i depart for Australia. With less than a month time, I'm seriously pressing for time. I haven't finished packing. Worse still, i've not even bought my rice cooker, mosturizer, hangers, flip flops, personal laptop, portable hardware reader and the list goes on. Everything seemed undone. But yet, i don't feel the rush, the drive to settle it asap. To date, what i've done is perhaps nothing.

I miss all my friends.
I miss hanging out with them.
I miss all their crapping.
I miss their laughter.
I miss their silly jokes.
I miss them messing with my hair.
I miss talking to them.
I miss walking home with them.
I miss the daily gossiping.
I miss the times we copied homework.
I miss the days we had sleepovers.
I miss them badly, even if it means them calling me short.
and yes, i do not deny, i miss him and all the times we spent together.

It's not a good day today. With such a pleasing weather, it makes me feel more melancholic at times. Ironic, yet true. Perhaps, that is why people often indulge in dreams, and delude themselves from reality. One can create own dreams, but they cannot alter their fate by any means. Wake up, imagine possible with the future.

Looking ahead?
I'm trying.

*forget the past, live the present, mould the future.

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